OLIVETTE, MISSOURI — The parents of two children are dead after a man shot his wife before turning the gun on himself inside the couple’s home in city of Olivetter, a suburb of St. Louis, police said.
(KSDK Channel 5, St Louis, MO) The Olivette Police Department is investigating what appears to be a murder-suicide of Tadesse Wodajo and Tigist Mamo, both immigrants from Ethiopia.
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Tadesse B. Wodajo, 47, shot and killed Tigist F. Mamo, 35, before shooting himself Wednesday morning in the 9400 block of Indian Meadows Drive, Olivette police Capt. Mike Roemer said. Both were immigrants from Ethiopia.
The motive for the killing was unclear, police said, although neighbors told police the couple had been having relationship troubles. Police were not aware of any previous problems at home, in a subdivision north of Olive Road and west of Dielman Road, and had not been called to the address in the past, Roemer said.
The couple’s two children, a boy and girl of elementary school age, are safe, Roemer said.
The children called an uncle after the 7 a.m. shooting, and the uncle called police. Roemer declined to say where the children were when the shooting took place or if they witnessed the killings. He also did not provide the ages of the children.
When investigators arrived they found the husband dead on the floor, and his wife dead in another room.
The Wodajos are immigrants from Ethiopia. The children are staying with family members and are being treated by medical and psychological professionals.
By Patrick M. O’Connell | ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH
71 thoughts on “Ethiopian man shoots wife and kills himself in St. Louis, MO”
Eleni,
I have something for not only for you friend but who ever wants to share it with anyone seeking help. Cheating,jealosy,rapping and sophistry are not good but all are happening. When it comes to Ethiopia there is nothing special. They happen here and there. However, the worst part is handling the crisis. Ethiopians prefer to talk behind their partner than to discuss straightforward. CAN you imagine, I remember my friend used to tell me his hard feelings about his wife. And I asked him if he discused it with her…Guess what..he said ‘I don’t want to discuss with her, I know what I am going to do…” Glad they are still together though. You some handles some not. some discuss others don’t…
Habesha/Ethiopians associate little things with whatever happened before when ever mistakes were made. The bring issues that they have already forgiven them years and years before by saying…”you did this you did that 5 years ago..whatever.” Ethiopians have more respect to the “society” than to themselves. They try to give controlled love to their partner, trying to hide their movement, plans, hiding their appreciation. Ingeneral We are not as respectful to our partners as we are to friends, families and colleagues.
I think, Habesha wants to be loved, respected, and appreicated than to give them to their partner. I usually tell my friend, even politically, everything is prejuduce, if you are opponent, u r not supporter. No one respects your ideas. The same holds true with Ethiopian partners. I doubt if they live for the sake of love, or living for others which is the ultimate goal of marriage. ONCE you get married, your personal needs are gone by 50%. DO NOT EVEN have bachelor friend. THAT really matters. His plans are to set you divorce and backbite you later.
Once last point, let’s accept the unbalanced nature of living standard that you could be through. Being friends are not enough. make sure all your plans, feelings know your partner’s friends, family NOT YOUR PARENTS. your partner can do the same. In otherwords, wife needs to be close to her brotthers,father & mothers-in-laws. Husband need to be friendly with sis, dad, mom-in-laws.
If all this doesn’t work, Divorce could be your last option. But there is one thing you wana look at; counselling. If Divorce is your solution, make it in piece and not in hostile. make sure you can visit each other. Otherwise, I guarantee you won’t make it in you next marriage as well. I wouldn’t marry a divorced woman.
Once upon a time, Hitler, was a powerful man on the earth but he wasn’t able to manage his wife. LOOK at calebrities, neither of them are successful at home while they make hell amout of money outside. My advice is make good time home and whatever comes is still enough for both of you.
Another issue is families, (whethere they have children or by themselves) have the wrong feeling of independency, different plans, for example, the man’s dream could be to make more money, build high rise building in Ethiopia. wife’s dream could be to fulfill her parent’s needs, pay money to bring her sister, brother to the “US.” Man wants to go back home wife may want stay little longer. The weird part, they don’t discuss each other. For me this is fake life, mariage.. PLEASE STOP IT. Stop living for yourself but for your partner. I hope you don’t get me wrong. “The seemingly impossible is Possible.”
Amen
As I am arranging the funeral of the two I want to share my advice to all Ethiopians in the Diaspora.
1) Establish a Commitee of anti-dometic violence of Ethiopian men and women in your city.
2) Do not try mediation if a threat of “killing” has been attered by the man. Encourage the involvement of faith leaders, professional counselors and the law.
3)Teach patience, alternative ways …e.g Encourage separation in case of repeated domestic violence case or severe argument. The man had a good choice of renting an apartment for himself and arrange visitation rights.
4) Do not be fools. Guns do not protect you. Just do not buy guns. They are tempting. They are not good for children.
I reject the the issue of guns as a form of freedom in America. Actually the NRA has interpreted the constitution wrongly. ‘A well regulated militia” is the army or the national guard.In most cases in the diaspora Ethiopians buy guns to hurt their family members. This has to stop! Domestic violence is universal, but such killing was unheard in Ethiopia in my life time, no matter how life is painful.
5) Also arrange a family conference and talk about how to stop domestic discord that can lead to violence, especially when children are involved.
6) Stop the blame game of men or women. Just enlighten yourself about these issues and find solutions.
Our hearts are with the family members and the children.
7)Turn to your faith and respectful traditions of your people.
8)Teach tolerance, forgiveness and patience in families.
I will use every medium to share my ideas to stop this madness. The prayer and the burreal will done tomorrow. May God help us.
Gedlu
This is in response to the comment by “Female”
Hi, I am really telling the truth, nothing but the truth! There is no hidden secret here. All the bad news you here about Ethiopian couples living in America… the problem are women! And for your suggestion of calling a hot line, that is not a solution either. You guys need to stop and think. Learn from other immigrants. Stop being too selfish. To have a family and young kids and doing adultery is the ultimate crime. you know what is the worst about women like my wife(?), they are not ashamed of themselves. They believe it is an adventure, they all say ” this is America”
But, trust me my sister, in the end they are the losers, big losers.
A man who mistrust his wife has to work on how to deal with this kind of behavior. Guys here in America there are plenty of resources to get help. On the other hand ladies also has to stop behaviours that lead to jealousy and mistrust because instead of love and respect you may end up being a victim. Watch out those little things are the cause of major conflicts in a family. I work as a social worker and deal with many African Family the problem is rising not only with spouses but between kids who are accepting the dominant culture and parents who are not willing to change. Egzabher Awtan nyw !!!
If you have marriage problem, seek help from professionals, friends and families, elders and from your church. Specially church is the good and the effective solution for that. Compromise with your partner, do bot sacrifice for something not worth. If you feel bitterness with your partner, go and seek help from “ANGER MANAGEMENT”. Brothers and Sisters, you may not know but there is so much help out there before you take some once life and yours.
ebakchue sewech angedadele ensmama kalhone degmo meleyayet aysalme
As to me, if a husband or wife cheated, they should be punished some how. I will not leave alone a wife who cheated on me and I do expect the same from my wife if I cheated. If there is a problem, they should discuss before starting cheating and separate if they are irreconcilable.
In any case, for a crime committed, there should be a price to be paid. My only sympathy is again for the innocent kids.
Gedlu Metaferia, you seemes like you are a family member if so, instead of arrenging a funeral, will you take care of this innocent little kids who are here alone . i hope you do that? thanks
This is for Abiy, and Sol, you guys are so weird and a confused, FULL of idiot! first of all if you are a nice guy and treat your wife (woman) well,why do you think she will go for another guy???? i don’t think she will ever cheat on you. actually, what do i expect from you, i can see what kind of man you are based on how you acted on the above. i hope your wife is aware of this? i wish her that she can get you locked up soon before you do anything. trust me sooner or later you will be in jail you will see!!
setasthla, dedeb!!!
This is for saba:
Here we are again: another addition to our women. You sound like them. You are one of them.My comment is based on facts, pure facts.You on the other hand are acting like those women who betrayed their families.May be you already did this to your whatever.Come to your sense,my friend, ask your self how our women behave when they come to this country, specially those with minimal education.There are many cases in every state…..trust me!
Female2
May the kids get comfort and support they deserve in their current ordeal and in their future!!
We didn’t hear what the root cause of this horrible event. However it is not hard to come to realize Ethiopians mind and heart are not as beautful as their face and skin. When they encounter with life problems most Ethiopians solutions are huge empty-self-pride, cruelity, meanness, unforgivingness, hurting their own and others.
Even with out any problem their overall everyday life is:
LYING : about everything and anything
CHEATING: on wife/husband or bfriend/gfriend — stealing
best friends girl/boy/husb/wife and proud of it
as if they hold Phd.
BACKSTABING:
friend/realitive who helped them in their
problem time.
SPREADING NAME TARNSHING NEWS:
about their friends or others they don’t know
etc. etc. etc.
Well, should I say more or you fill the rest
Can Anyone, think of the root cause of the above behaviors I mentioned and a lot more that I hold back? Why is that our people looks good-looking from the outside but their inside is a rotten egg that its smell alone will kill you?
Female2
I’m a parent of a 6 month old child and couldn’t stop crying when I heard the news. It is heart breaking and I’m stunned.
I hope the kids didn’t see what happened.
“Egziabher nebsachewin yimarew” There is no point of blaming any bodynow, it is too late. We just have to learn from it.
My condolance & pryer goes out to the children and their family.
Can any body be volientier to help such problems? I see the problem on both sides. I can say that our men are not aware of the rights of women. The women are even the worest. They are sweet when you are in peace, but they are bitter and make their men more bitter when they are disatisfied even a little. This is true, and is pushing many into disaster. Even you can understand this from the comments posted here. So, please is there any body who can help as on the issue of relationship?
Abiy, please don’t keep saying ethiopian women, women, how about you guys? you guys are the one who do the evil thing , the killing, cheating, mistreating us. and based on your information you said you will be the next on the news, my wish for is to be lacked up soon before you hurt any one. are sick! sick! i hope you guys don’t have any kids togethr?
You know something, if you treat your woman right, trust me she will never ever go to look for some body els pariod!!
do that and you will see the difrence.
egzabiher yerdah!
This is for Aby/Saba in particular and everyone else in general:
First of all, I would like to express my deepest and heart felt sympathy to the families and friends of both individuals. May God be with you in this time of great tragedy.
I believe I have said it in the past on this forum; I have been there and know how it feels. I am here sharing my experience because I did not have access for a gun at that particular moment. I am glad I did not. The mental torture I was subjected too was enormous. It clouded my judgment and almost committed such hideous crime. For those who did not go through it may easy to say just walk away leave it and so on. First of all if you are married and have children and property in the marriage, you cannot just walk away even if you wanted. It is not up to you, it is up to the courts to dissolve the marriage, decide on your property and your children. Unfortunately, the court system is not only blind but also heartless. The lawyers are ruthless even your own lawyer lie to you and makes a deal behind you. It is a traumatic experience. Your children are used to harm you emotionally. Surviving this entire enormous ordeal requires a great deal of patience. I do not know what transpired in this case. The indication from Mr. Gedlu who seems to be familiar with the couple is there was some domestic violence is involved. There is no reason for domestic violence. There is a difference between a real domestic violence and a false accusation of domestic violence. The point is. It is hard it is extremely painful. If you are in a toxic relationship (marriage) document every event daily. If you reach to the point that you are about to do something leave your home and go to your friends. Please do not drink or take drug hoping that it would ease your pain. It would make it worse. For further advice Read “The Aborted Dream”. I am not using this tragedy to sell my book. If you are interested contact me and will send it for free. I will even pay the shipping and handling. My e-mail is [email protected]. This is what Ato Abraham Yayeh said about the Aborted dream:
“Accept my sincere greetings! I read your inspiring book “The Aborted Dream” in a single day amid my busy schedules. I couldn’t lay down the book until I find out the end of your ordeal. My heart goes to touch the soul of the two innocent kids that deserves the great sacrifices you paid for their sake. I really appreciate your endurance and repeated forgiveness to the many evil deeds of your ex-wife and her demonized sisters of which I have no reservation to characterize them as a dangerous psychopaths of the highest order. I am really curious to learn the reaction of your ex-wife and her satanic sisters after they read your book.
I believe you are personally relieved from your painful experience by sharing your story through your well scripted book. I am also confident that this interesting book will help your great kids to depart from their wild mom and join their caring dad when they reach the appropriate age to decide for their own destiny. If the kids are not learning the Amharic language, you must immediately start translating the book in English. If I may give a small tip, you need only 197 days if you can, at least, translate one page of the book daily.
Finally, I wish to congratulate you for your dedication to your children and your victory against all odds. And keep the great spirit for dedication alive.“
Kind regards,
Abraham Yayeh
Ato Aby: It seems that you are in a toxic relationship, if you cannot save it, please get out of it and get your divorce. The divorce proceeding is going to be more painful. Be ready for it. Once you pass that, try to build your life by focusing what interests you. I just completed a manuscript for my second book titled “From a miserable marriage to a happy Divorce”. This book is based on research and has lots of good advice for those who are in bad relationship and those in shaky ground. The book will be available in May 2009.
Dear Saba: You may not feel the pain that Ato Aby is feeling; however, you should understand his pain. There is no reason for name calling. If you could, provide a sound advice that could be useful for everyone.
What is sad is that we seem to react when such tragedy occurs in our community. We all should actively search for solution to prevent such sad events. May God rest their soul and may God help these kids through out their lives.
T. Samuel
Lubaba from St Louis MO
Please do not judge the decease for we do not know what happend, sure it was not right what happend to that couple. We need to put our focus on praying for those children for a sound mind and a healing heart. Lets make a change with words to encourage the family and others so that this won’t happen again. Enough is Enough.
Tigist is not such a person. she is not living for material and she doesn’t behave like other young women. before she went to USA she already settled every thing for her family. to your surprise when she was around 20 she was the owner of cafe and restaurant here in Ethiopia. she sacrificed her life to her kids. She lives always in our heart, we love her. “beAbe Kegne endalche” esune gene endeakatelen botaw “Gehanem” naw. tekatelual. “lewchi alga lebet kega” neber. tekatela nora tekatela motech. We are sorry for her kids and family! may God bless them.
Oh my God, I am crying really hard. What is wrong with my people??? You know we are a very religious people, and the problem I see from whom we live abroad is we forget all our values and fear of God. Please we need to pray hard and bring our hearts close to God. I feel sick reading all the news. I have never read this kind of news before, I am new and this is a shocking news to me.
Please if sth doesn’t work out just run from it, the kids I really feel terible for them.
do not judge any of them, we don’t know exactly what was the problem with them, god knows only and let god judge them, they already dead they not gonna read this comments lets just pray for them and stop judging people, wow what a sad news i.m hearing and reading the story what have happened to these Miskeen couples…….. It wasn’t their fault it was just an evil thoughts in them…. Yikirta guys i.m just writing my opinions
my name is dejen ayana gebreselasie.
I live in australia….. I was actually on my phone and went on google and was searching for something else and I found this site there I was really shocked.. Why is this happening to us ethiopians habeshans..??? Us ethiopians and eritreas love each other, we are well known for our relgion and history…
May god rest them in peace..
And the kids god bless them,
This is really sad……
Peace,
R.I.p to both of them
I was a coworker of Tigist’s at the Crowne Plaza Hotel in Saint Louis. Tigist was beautiful… She was petite, cute, sweet, shy, and just an all-around decent person. What could drive someone to kill such a human being is beyond me.
This is really sad. What about the children. I knew Tadesse personaly and he is not the person to do that. Tigist was a strong person, too. This is just CRAZY!!!!!!!!!