By Elisabeth Hulette, The Capital
For the past few months, the Stimely family’s four daughters have been throwing nightly dance parties in their living room to the tunes of Disney’s wildly popular “High School Musical.”
It’d be a nightly scene like any other, except that two of the girls are brand new to both American people and pop culture. The Stimelys adopted Masene, 5, and Safiya, 3, from Ethiopia in November. Their mother, Carol Bittner, said the dance parties have brought the girls closer to their new American sisters, Ruth, 7, and Lillian, 3.
“It feels good to have two new people in the family,” Ruth said. “We just play and have fun.”
The Stimelys are among a growing number of people adopting from Ethiopia. China and Russia have been the major hubs for adoption, but Ethiopia’s star is rising, Ms. Bittner said.
A combination of the country’s relatively easy adoption paperwork and large number of children orphaned by the AIDS epidemic has drawn an increasing number of adoption agencies over the past few years, said Merrily Ripley, director of Adoption Advocates International, the agency that helped the Stimelys adopt Masene and Safiya.
About 3,500 Ethiopian children have been adopted by American families since 1990, and of those, about 1,250 children were adopted in 2007 alone, said Hermela Kebede, director of the Ethiopian Community Center in Washington. Government officials have estimated that 4,000 will be adopted in 2008, she said.
“That’s how much it’s growing,” Ms. Kebede said.
Wait times for adopting Ethiopian children are longer than they’ve ever been, said Ms. Ripley, as agencies realize that Ethiopia’s clear adoption procedures make it a good country for international adoption.
Also, because of new drugs that reduce the risk of spreading HIV, American families can now adopt HIV-positive children, Ms. Ripley said. Adoption Advocates placed about 30 HIV-positive children from Ethiopia last year, she said.
“That’s something we never thought we’d be able to do 5 to 10 years ago,” she said.
American families are aware that HIV, malaria, yellow fever and poverty have left many children orphaned.
“I think because they’re aware of the need there, the orphans, a lot of folks are motivated by wanting to adopt a child,” Ms. Ripley said.
That was one reason why the Stimelys decided to adopt from Ethiopia.
Ross Stimely, a teacher at Broadneck High School, and Ms. Bittner, who is an attorney for the federal court in Baltimore, had talked about adopting for years. It would be a way to make a difference and also grow their family, Mr. Stimely said.
They decided to work through Adoption Advocates because unlike agencies that focus on babies, Adoption Advocates works with older children and tries to keep siblings together, Ms. Bittner said. The agency has placed as many as five siblings together, Ms. Ripley said.
They applied and in May were told the agency had found two little girls who needed a family. But summer is the rainy season in east Africa, and the Stimelys had to wait until November to make the trip.
They passed the months by writing to Masene and Safiya, sending them photos of their new house, their new sisters. The trip they finally took in November with Ruth and Lillian was the furthest they had ever traveled, Mr. Stimely said.
He and Ms. Bittner met their new daughters on Nov. 19 – a date that also happened to be their 13th wedding anniversary.
Masene and Safiya are from a rural part of southern Ethiopia, where people raise sheep and goats and have neither electricity nor running water, Ms. Bittner said. The girls were apprehensive when they first arrived in the United States.
To help them adjust, the Stimelys have been cooking traditional Ethiopian food, like potato stew and injera, a sort of pancake that’s a staple of the Ethiopian diet, Mr. Stimely said. Ruth and Lillian have been taking Ethiopian food to school in their packed lunches. And they’re trying to learn Amharic, the regional Ethiopian language.
Lillian and Ruth have already picked up some Amharic, he said, just as Masene and Safiya have picked up the words to High School Musical. Lillian, at 3 years old, has already forgotten what it’s like not to have adopted sisters, Ms. Bittner said.
“For her, it’s completely normal,” Ms. Bittner said. “Like, doesn’t everyone have a sister from Ethiopia?”
The Stimelys hope their story will inspire more people to adopt one of the many Ethiopian children who need families. If their family can do it, anyone can, Ms. Bittner said.
“We are completely normal, regular people, except we saw a problem and acted on it,” she said. “We’re just raising our kids. It’s just life, and you can do it and it can be great.”
6 thoughts on “3,500 Ethiopian children adopted by Americans since 1990”
The exodus of millions of Ethiopians – young, old, and infants – to foreign countries
The Woyanne government is unable to deal with the adult as well as with the young Ethiopians. Millions of adult, educated or uneducated, Ethiopians have left Ethiopia and are living in other countries, struggling to meet their financial needs. All these middle-aged Ethiopians could have chosen to stay in their country if they have had a good government that treats all ethnic groups on equal basis and distribute the hard-earned and the donated money fairly among the Ethiopian citizens. For failing to distribute equally the wealth of the country to all Ethiopian citizens, for ignoring justice to be served for all the people of Ethiopia, and for purposely undermining the freedom of every Ethiopian citizen, the Woyanne government has forced millions of Ethiopian Christians, Jews, and Muslims to live their country where their ancestors had lived and died and to find shelters and employment in other foreign countries.
What is more disturbing, more alarming, and more frightening than the exodus of these Ethiopian adults to foreign countries is the slew of Ethiopian infants living their country every year without their wills because they are too young to know the differences between their biological and their adopted mothers and given away or sold out to the wealthy Americans. Where does the money collected by the Meles-appointed Ethiopian adoption agents go? Who benefits from this lucrative-infant selling businesses? Who else, except Meles and his criminal political gangs and the infant-selling agents. By far, Meles and his criminal gangs have enriched themselves by selling crosses, paintings, artifacts, lands, and now by selling Ethiopian infants in thousands every year. Why doesn’t he sell the whole country to America and make it one of the 52 States since Liberia is assumedly one of the 51 United States?
Is there any way of knowing how many infants from Mekelle region, how many infants from the Amhara region, how many infants from the Oromo region, and how many infants from other Ethiopian regions are sold out so far to foreign-infant bidders? I’m sure the number of infants from Mekelle regions being sold out to wealthy Europeans or Americans are less, or non existence, in number than the other Ethiopian regions whose people are totally condemned by the Woyanne regime. The Biblical King Herod the Great didn’t want to have a political rival – the infant Jesus – so he destroyed thousands of innocent infants from Bethlehem and its surroundings (Matthew 2:16-18). Fear of being over thrown, no wonder why, Meles is selling thousands of infants perhaps from the Amhara and the Oromo regions to foreigners, jailing hundreds of political rivals and slaughtering many of them with out any fear of his God-given conscience. In fact these are the clearest methods of Meles’ ethnic cleansing: by selling out thousands of infants from the regions of his political opponents, by jailing hundreds of his rivals or by killing thousands of them on spot, and by allowing millions of Ethiopians to leave the country because he fears for his political survival.
When a country, like Ethiopia, has an extreme evil dictator such as Meles Seitanawi, the earth trembles and quakes at about 8.9 magnitude on the Richter scale, and if such an earthquake whose epicenter is at Mekelle University, while Meles and all his political advisors, including Abune Paulos and Al Amoudi, visiting the MU, hits Ethiopia, the MU will collapse and be buried under the earth with all its visitors. Then historians will say that natural disaster ended Meles’ tyrannical regime for the good of the Ethiopian people.
Assta B. Gettu
There are 4.8 million orphans in Ethiopia; 1.2 million children have been orphaned by AIDS alone. Ethiopia’s doctor to children ratio is 1 to 24,000. This is an enormous task for any government to handle let alone woyane. Think of the children first. Do not politicize this just to be anti woyane.
It is hard to be against adoption because a lot of the kids that are being adopted do not have families (mom & dad) and I believe most adoptive parents will provide more opportunities for the kids.
However, I still feel bad for the young boys and girls who are coming to the United States or Europe through adoption because they will have a hard time to adapt to the culture, food and people. For example, my wife met a 3 years old Ethiopian boy and his adoptive parents at a birthday party in the US. My wife and I have a 3-year-old son who will have a hard time to stay with strangers even for a single day. My son cries even when he goes to the daycare. This tells me that how hard it will be for the young kids to use to the culture, food and people. Just to tell you the truth, I cried when my wife told me about this boy. Although, I know this boy will be in a better position in the long term, he will have a hard time to adjust to the culture, which may have an impact on him when he grows up.
So, the point that I am trying to make is that adoption has both advantages and disadvantages for the kids.
Best regards,
Yes! adoption has advantages and disadvantages. However, most of the adopive parents adopt kids in their early years because of attachment & adaptation issue. They feel if they have them as babies the kids would have strong bonding with their adoptive parents & smooth adaptation to their new life. Believe me, the adoptive parents take the bonding issue very seriously. Actually the adoptive parents do everything including consulting child development specialists and read all literature they can find before undertaking adoption.
‘Separation anxiety’ the term child development specialists coined to describe situations such as Mark’s kid (see comment above) crying when he separates from his father/mother to go to daycare is common among many kids. Just because kids cry while separating from their parents, does not mean they will not be adjusting in their new environment. And some kids do not cry at all. That does not mean that they would not be traumatised later on life, if the separation is permanent.
Coming back to my main point, that is why many adoptive parents opt to adopting kids while they are babies. Actually, one big discussion topic among adoptive parents is neglect of older kids for adoption consideration. Lately, some have shown interest in adopting older siblings of their adopted children and in some cases prefering to adopt older kids out of this concern. This myth that just because these kids are adopted, that they have become helpless, who have been traumatised permanently and to be pitied is misplaced sympathy. I do not want to minimise the challenges particularly for the parents & the kids more imporatantly when they grow up. However, most of this adopted kids are adjusting fine and are doing dandy. Give it some years we will have more well adjusted successful Marcus Samuelsons. Instead of voicing our mispalaced concerns, what we can do positively is help these adoptive parents cultivate Ethiopian culture in their kids life by inviting them into our social gatherings, fetivities etc and if possible by organising language classes & summer camps alongside our own kids. Most of the adoptive parents that I know are intersted in such initiatives and we are starting one one in our area soon. Anyone who would like to start such intiatives in your area can express your willingness here and I will notify you my contact address in the future.
Well said Aba Doyo. I completely agree there are difficulties in adjusting to a complete strange environment for the older kids. It is heartbreaking to read in adoption blogs some of the difficulty the kids and parents go through.
Dear Getachew,
Let us be realistic; it is not AIDS only that orphaned these Ethiopian children; it is Meles Seitanawi who orphaned most of these children by incarcerating their parents and by forcing thousands of parents to disappear without their traces. By the way, how did Emperor Haile Selassie handle the Ethiopian orphans during his time? He opened orphanages in Addis Ababa, hired teachers for the orphans and took care of them. He never gave a single child to foreigners for adoption. Why didn’t Meles Seitanawi do the same thing to these innocent children? If Meles uses the resources properly, stops waging wars with Somalia and with the people of Ogaden, he would have enough money to take care of the Ethiopian children left without fathers and mothers. By far, Meles is more responsible than Mother Nature for making thousands of Ethiopian children motherless and fatherless.